Sports Night

"Smoky"

Written by
Aaron Sorkin

Directed by
Robert Berlinger

Table Draft - 11/28/98
1st rev. - 11/30/98 (Blue)
2nd rev. - 12/01/98 (Pink)
3rd rev. - 12/01/98 (Yellow)

SPORTS NIGHT

"Smoky"
#N313
Cast

Dan........................Josh Charles
Casey.....................Peter Krause
Isaac..............Robert Guillaume
Dana................Felicity Huffman
Jeremy....................Josh Malina
Natalie.................Sabrina Lloyd
Kim.........................Kayla Blake
Elliot........................Greg Baker
Chris.........Timothy Davis-Reed
Will..........................Ron Ostrow
Dave.....................Jeff Mooring
Sally...................Brenda Strong

SPORTS NIGHT

REMINDER:  THIS EPISODE WILL AIR WELL BEFORE THE
"SALLY" EPISODE, IN WHICH CASEY, GORDON AND SALLY
HAVE ALL SLEPT TOGETHER IN VARIOUS COMBINATIONS.

(TEASER)

FROM THE DARKNESS WE HEAR:
(Dana (VO))

DANA (VO)

Three minutes to air, people, this
a three minute call.

INT. DAN AND CASEY'S OFFICE/NEWSROOM/CORRIDORS/CONTROL
ROOM/STUDIO - NIGHT - (NIGHT 1)

(Dan, Casey, Dana, Jeremy, Natalie, Kim, Elliot, Chris, Will,
Dave, Atmosphere)

  CASEY AND DAN ARE DRESSED FOR THE AIR.  CASEY IS GOING THROUGH
SOME PAPERS.

DAN

Casey?

CASEY

(DISTRACTED) Yeah.

DAN

I've made a decision.

CASEY

What is it?

DAN

It's time.

CASEY

It is?

DAN

It's time.

CASEY

(CALLING OUT) Natalie!

DAN

It's absolutely time.

CASEY

We're having some very bizarre
computer problems, have you noticed
that?  The LC wire's getting numbers
wrong.

NATALIE COMES IN--

NATALIE

What do you need?

CASEY

(READING)  Messersmith won the Gold
Medal in the pole vault with a leap of
238 feet, six inches?

NATALIE

That doesn't sound right.

CASEY

It lacks a ring of truth, yes.

NATALIE

(LOOKING OVER THE PAPER)  238 feet, six
inches in the pole vault.  (BEAT)
That'd be a record, wouldn't it?

CASEY

Yes it would.

NATALIE

(AS SHE LEAVES)  Elliot!

NATALIE'S GONE.  CASEY GOES BACK TO HIS PAPERS.  DAN IS STARING
AT HIM.

CASEY

Why are you staring at me?

DAN

Because it's time.

CASEY

It's not time.

CASEY HEADS TO THE STUDIO, FOLLOWED BY DAN, AS WE
RESET TO:
INT. NEWSROOM/CORRIDORS - CONTINUOUS - (NIGHT 1)

DAN

It is time.  It's past time.

CASEY

It's not past time.

DAN

It's well past time.  You need to start
meeting women.

CASEY

I've met many women.

DAN

No you haven't.  You haven't met many
women.  And that's why I'm here.

CASEY

Boy, I like the sound of this.

DAN

You got married at 23 to a woman you
met when you were 19.

CASEY

I know.  I was there.

DAN

So you agree.

CASEY

To what?

DAN

You agree that it's time.

CASEY

You said it was past time.

DAN

It is past time.

CASEY

Then I'm screwed.

DAN

But I'm gonna help you out.

CASEY

Thank God for that, Danny.  Thank God
for you.

DAN

Thank God indeed.

CASEY

Indeed I do.

DAN

You know why I can help you out?

CASEY

Why.

DAN

Because there's still time.

BY NOW DAN AND CASEY HAVE LANDED AT THE ANCHOR DESK AND WE
RESET TO:
INT. CONTROL ROOM/STUDIO - CONTINUOUS - (NIGHT 1)

DAVE

60 seconds to VTR, two minutes live.

CHRIS

Loading F/X BF-4.

WILL

Preview animation 1, 1A and 4.

CHRIS

BF-4.  Boston-Foxhole.

JEREMY ENTERS FROM THE STUDIO--

DANA

Jeremy.

JEREMY

Yes.

DANA

Tell me the story so far on
UCLA/Arizona.

JEREMY

The story, Dana, is shooting
percentage.  Shooting percentage and
offensive glass. Last I checked, UCLA
was 12 for 24 from the field, one for
six at the stripe.  Arizona's press
forced 12 turnovers which led to 15
points.  The 'Cats,' needless to say,
were dominant in the paint and
McDuffy's got four fouls.  That is the
story.

NATALIE

Jeremy?

JEREMY

Yeah.

DANA

What's the score?

JEREMY

Wow.

DANA

Jeremy--

JEREMY

The devil's in the details.

DANA

Jeremy.

JEREMY

66-50 Arizona.

DANA

Thank you.

JEREMY

No problem.

DAVE

Stand by audio, stand by VTR.

ELLIOT

Preview 6 and 16.

KIM

Will, lemme hear sound F/X 7.  Just me.

DAVE

Here we go.

NATALIE

Good show.

DAVE

Roll VTR.

DANA

Good show everybody.

DAN

The time is right, Casey, the time is
now.  You strike while the iron is hot.

CASEY

What iron?

DAN

The iron.  You're gonna strike it.

CASEY

'Cause it's hot right now.

DAN

It's scorching hot.

CASEY

Okay.

DAN

It is.

CASEY

Natalie, can I have a re-cal time on
seven.

NATALIE

1:20, but we've got wiggle room.

CASEY

How much?

NATALIE

(TO DANA) How much?

DANA

On seven?

NATALIE

Lee Trevino.

DANA

Casey, don't make a meal out of it.

CASEY

How much?

DANA

Five seconds.  You go to ten, I kick
your ass.

CASEY

You ever hear of artistic freedom?

DANA

You ever heard of me kicking your ass?

CASEY

Yes I have.

DANA

Five seconds.

DAVE

15 live.

DAN

A lot's changed since the last time
you were out there.

CASEY

Out where?

DAN

There.  Out there.  Where women are.

CASEY

Everybody still wears shoes, right?

DAN

Do they ever.

DAVE

In three, two--

CASEY

Good evening, from New York City I'm
Casey McCall alongside Dan Rydell,
those stories, plus we'll show why if
you haven't seen Davis Love play
Pebble Beah, then you haven't seen
Shakespeare the way it was meant to be
played.

DAN

College hoops? You want college hoops?
How 'bout Syracuse, N.Y., where the
Orangemen blew the roof off the
Carrier Dome.  How 'bout Oklahoma,
where the corn's not the only thing
high as an elephant's eye.

CASEY

All that, comin' up after this.  You're
watching Sports Night on CSC, so stick
around.

DAVE

We're out.

KIM

90 seconds back.

DAN

(TO CASEY) You know the biggest
difference?

CASEY

The biggest difference between what?

DAN

The biggest difference between women
then and women now.

CASEY

What?

DAN

You're on television.

DAVE

Stand by.

FADE OUT.

END OF TEASER

ACT I

(A)

INT. ISAAC'S OFFICE/EXECUTIVE CORRIDOR - DAY - (DAY 2)
(Isaac, Dana, Natalie, Atmosphere)

ISAAC IS AT THE WINDOW.  DANA KNOCKS ON THE DOOR.

ISAAC

Come on in.

DANA

You wanted to see me?

ISAAC

Yes. Siddown.

DANA KEEPS STANDING.

DANA

I got a note that said you wanted to
see me.

ISAAC

Yeah, have a seat.

DANA

Is anything wrong?

ISAAC

No.  Siddown.

DANA

You never send me a note.

ISAAC

I usually call your office.

DANA

Yes.  Or you have Marsha find me or you
grab me at the run down and say can I
see you.

ISAAC

Why don't you have a seat.

DANA

But this time you sent me a note.

ISAAC

Please sit.

DANA

It said you needed to see me.

ISAAC

Dana, I need to move my day along just
a little bit faster than this.

DANA

I'm just saying if this is gonna be
bad news, I'd like to sit.

ISAAC

Feel free.

DANA

Thank you.

DANA FINALLY SITS.

ISAAC

I want to start grooming you.

DANA

(BEAT) I don't understand.

ISAAC

You heard me.

DANA

You want to start grooming me?

ISAAC

Yes.

DANA

(PAUSE) You better be talkin' about my
hairstyle, Isaac, 'cause--.

ISAAC

Don't go nuts.

DANA

I'm not going nuts, I'm just saying
that's the only kind of grooming I'm
prepared to talk about at this
particular moment.  Was there anything
else?

ISAAC

When the time comes, I want the show
to go where I want the show to go. And
I want the show to go to you.

DANA

Isaac--

ISAAC

Dana, I'm not foolin' around.

DANA

Fine then, we'll have this
conversation 15 years from now.  Is
there anything else?

ISAAC

You want to be in a position where
it's a smart choice for Luther to
make.

DANA

I don't want to position myself.

ISAAC

You're gonna start coming to the
monthly lunches at Continental Corp.

DANA

No I'm not.

ISAAC

Yes you are.

DANA

How do you know I even want your job.

ISAAC

Everybody wants my job.

DANA

Not me.  I think your job stinks.  You
get to create your own show and make
all the decisions and have a big staff
and make a lot of money.  That's not
for me, Isaac.  I like to answer to
people.  I don't want to create.  When I
get a thought in my head, I like it to
die right there.

ISAAC

These monthly lunches, at first--

DANA

I'll tell you what else: Living on a
budget builds character.  And I've got
character up the whazoo, mister.

ISAAC

Yes you do.

DANA

When you hired me, when you hired me,
didn't you swear that you weren't
going to leave.  You did.  I remember
you swearing.  You swore.

ISAAC

I'm talking about down the line.

DANA

How far down the line.

ISAAC

Far.

DANA

Then stop sending me notes.

ISAAC

Dana, that was a near death experience at Christmas.
I don't know if I've ever seen Luther so mad.

DANA

You embarassed him on television.
He'll get over it.

ISAAC

He might get over it, but he won't
forget it.

DANA

Look, he yelled, he screamed.  But he
didn't fire you.  If he was gonna fire
you, he'd have fired you.

ISAAC

You don't fire a black executive
during a race-related public relations
problem.  You wait a while.

DANA

See? That's the kinda thing I don't
know.  So... you know... stop grooming.

ISAAC

Start coming with me to the lunches.
And the budget meetings.

DANA

What are you gonna do if you don't
work here?

ISAAC

I've been thinking a lot about
gardening.

DANA

Gardening?

ISAAC

I think I'd like to try organic
gardening.

DANA

(PAUSE) Do you even know what it is?

ISAAC

No.  But I was gonna get a book.

DANA

Good plan.

ISAAC

Let's keep this our little secret.

DANA

I shouldn't tell anyone you're
grooming me?

ISAAC

You shouldn't tell anyone that I'm
grooming you.

DANA

What if people ask?

ISAAC

Dana--

DANA

I'm serious.  What if someone askes me a
direct question about the grooming?

ISAAC

Dana, I'm serious.

DANA

Alright, alright, I won't tell anyone
that you're grooming me.

ISAAC

Thank you.

DANA

Goodbye.

DANA CLOSES THE DOOR BEHIND HER AS SHE LEAVES AND WE
RESET TO:
INT. EXECUTIVE CORRIDOR - CONTINUOUS - (DAY 2)

NATALIE IS WAITING OUTSIDE THE DOOR AND FALLS IN STEP WITH
DANA AS SHE COMES OUT OF THE OFFICE
. AS THEY TALK, THEY'LL
MOVE UP THE CORRIDOR.

DANA (CONT'D)

He wants to groom me.

NATALIE

What'd you say?

DANA

I told him I didn't want to be
groomed.  Everyone here's very happy
with the jobs they've got right now,
right?

NATALIE

Sure.

DANA

Natalie?

NATALIE

Yeah?

DANA

You're thinking about how you'd re-
decorate my office right now, aren't
you.

NATALIE

I was not.

DANA

Yes you were.

NATALIE

I was totally not at all.

DANA

In your little mind, you were
measuring for new curtains.

NATALIE

I was not measuring for curtains.

DANA

You'd keep the curtains?

NATALIE

And dump the plants.

NATALIE EXITS TOWARD THE NEWSROOM

DANA

Thank you.

AND DANA EXITS INTO AN OFFICE AS WE
CUT TO:

ACT I

(B)

INT. DAN AND CASEY'S OFFICE - DAY - (DAY 2)
(Dan, Casey, Sally)

CASEY IS SITTING IN A CHAIR IN THE MIDDLE OF A CONVERSATION
WITH SALLY.

SALLY

You're wrong.

CASEY

No I'm not.

SALLY

You want to make a bet?

CASEY

I don't want to take your money.

SALLY

They weren't gonna play Virginia in
the next round, they were gonna play
Louisiana Tech.

CASEY

You were gonna play Louisiana Tech.

SALLY

We were gonna play Clemson.  That's
when I injured my ankle.

CASEY

It was your knee and it was against
Louisiana Tech.

SALLY PUTS HER LEG UP ON THE CHAIR AND PULLS HER PANT LEG UP
SLIGHTLY.

SALLY

This is my ankle.

CASEY

(PAUSE) No doubt about it.

SALLY

It was injured playing Clemson.

CASEY

It came out of it okay.

SALLY

You think?

DAN ENTERS HAVING QUICKLY TAKEN IN THE SCENE--

DAN

Whoa, whoa, whoa.  What have we here?

SALLY

Hello Dan.

DAN

Sally, put your leg on the floor.

SALLY

I was telling Casey that I injured my
ankle against Clemson.

DAN

It was your knee.

SALLY

It was my ankle.

DAN

And you see how you were able to tell
me that without taking your clothes
off?

SALLY

I just assume you do that in your
head.  I'll see you later, Casey. Dan's
gonna want to warn you about me.

SALLY'S GONE--

CASEY

(CALLING) Bye.

DAN

What were you just doing?

CASEY

Nothing.

DAN

You were flirting with Sally.

CASEY

I wasn't conscious of it.

DAN

Conscious or not, you were doing it.

CASEY

Was Sally flirting with me?

DAN

Yes indeed she was.

CASEY

I missed the whole thing.

DAN

Thank God I got here when I did.

CASEY

I'm not gonna go out with Sally.

DAN

You don't have to go out with her, she
was strippin' down right here.

CASEY

We were talking about women's college
basketball.

DAN

Casey.  Please.  I'm not other people.

CASEY

I know.

DAN

And I know I said it was time, but
just to be clear, it's not time for
that.  It's not time to dally with
Sally.

CASEY

"To dally with Sally".

DAN

That was an unfortunate rhyme, but
still--

CASEY

What's your problem with Sally?

DAN

Look at her, Casey.  I don't think
she's of this world.

CASEY

You don't think she's of this world?

DAN

I do not.

CASEY

What world do you think she's of?

DAN

She scares me, Casey.  She's too good
looking.  Nobody's that good looking.
I'm not that good looking.

CASEY

You really think she was flirting with
me?

DAN

And her beauty comes from a very
strange place, have you noticed that?

CASEY

The places her beauty comes from
weren't all that strange to me.  I can
identify almost all of them.

DAN

Don't do it, Casey, she's got an
agenda.

CASEY

You think she wants a job on Sports
Night?

DAN

No, I think she wants to rule all of
Metropolis.

CASEY

You've seen the job she does on West
Coast Update.  She's a very skilled
producer.

DAN

Of course she's skilled, she's Satan's
handmaiden.

CASEY

She's not Satan's handmaiden.

DAN

On the entire planet, have you ever
seen anyone with eyes like that?  She's
a Steppford Producer.

CASEY

I say she's a very nice person.

DAN

I say she has no reflection.

CASEY

You're worrying about nothing.  She
wasn't flirting with me, I wasn't
flirting with her.

DAN

This is a well-oiled machine here.  I
don't want to see anyting interfere
with that.

CASEY

(LOOKING AT A PIECE OF PAPER)  Did a
high school girl from East Lansing run
the Boston Marathon in 2.6 seconds?

DAN

Doesn't sound right.

CASEY

We're not as well-oiled as you think.

END OF ACT I

ACT II

(C)

INT. NEWSROOM - DAY - (DAY 2)
(Jeremy, Natalie)

NATALIE SITS AT ONE OF THE COMPUTERS AND JEREMY STANDS BEHIND
HER.

NATALIE

See, it says "Minus-1, SM Trunc, err."

JEREMY

You should really call technical
support.

NATALIE

I like it when you fix it.  IT's so
cute and nerdy.  I could just lick you
up.

JEREMY

This is a serious computer problem, I
don't want to fool around with this.

NATALIE

What does "err" mean?

JEREMY

Call technical support.

NATALIE

What does "err" mean?

JEREMY

It means a mistake.

NATALIE

Is it Latin?

JEREMY

It's "E-R-R". It means error.  Call
technical support.

NATALIE

"Minus-1, SM Trunc", what does it
mean?

JEREMY

Natalie--

NATALIE

C'mon, just one.

JEREMY

(BEAT)  It means the truncation
indicator alone is wider than the
specified width.  IT probably also
indicates a "Minus-5 Type SCP" which
is an invalid queue element.

NATALIE

(A LITTLE TURNED ON)  Okay.  Then it
says "Minus-15, out of range." What
does that mean?

JEREMY

It means it's out of range.

NATALIE

You're not doing this right.

JEREMY

What the hell are we doing?

NATALIE

Well I thought we were having phone
sex, but I guess you just weren't
interested.

JEREMY

We were having phone sex?

NATALIE

Well not phone sex, but whatever.  We
were having sex.

JEREMY

I didn't even know.

NATALIE

And frankly, it showed up in your
performance.

JEREMY

I wasn't having sex.

NATALIE

I know that, Jeremy, I was sitting
here having sex all by myself.

JEREMY

You were having sex.

NATALIE

Yes.

JEREMY

Well I think maybe you're not doin' it
right.

NATALIE

Call technical support.

CUT TO:

ACT II

(D)

INT. NEWSROOM/EXECUTIVE CORRIDOR/ISAAC'S OFFICE - DAY-
(DAY 2)

(Isaac, Sally)

ISAAC COMES OUT OF DAN AND CASEY'S OFFICE.  SALLY IS IN THE
NEWSROOM. SHE RUSHES TO CATCH UP WITH ISAAC AND THEY WALK
TOWARD HIS OFFICE.

SALLY

Hello Isaac.

ISAAC

Hello Sally.

SALLY

Sharp suit!

ISAAC

Thank you, Sally.

SALLY

I mean it.  That is a sharp suit.

ISAAC

Thank you again.

SALLY

Who makes that suit?

ISAAC

I have no idea.

SALLY

Is it Armani?

ISAAC

I honestly have no idea.

SALLY

Could be Hugo Boss.

ISAAC

You never know.

SALLY

But either way, it's a very sharp
suit.

ISAAC AND SALLY EXIT TO ISAAC'S OFFICE
RESET TO:
INT. ISAAC'S OFFICE - CONTINUOUS - (DAY 2)

ISAAC

I'm awfully happy with it, thanks.

SALLY

Sure.

ISAAC

What do you want?

SALLY

Are you quitting your job?

ISAAC

No.

SALLY

You're not?

ISAAC

No.

SALLY

I heard you were.

ISAAC

You heard wrong.

SALLY

I keep my ear to the ground.

ISAAC

I have no doubt about it.

SALLY

And I'm happy for Dana.

ISAAC

She'll be glad to hear it.

SALLY

May I be blunt?

ISAAC

There is evidence to suggest that
you're capable of it, yes.

SALLY

I think I'm the right person for the
job.

ISAAC

Who's job?

SALLY

Dana's job.

ISAAC

I think Dana wants Dana's job.

SALLY

Dana's gonna have your job.

ISAAC

No, sadly, I'm gonna have my job.

SALLY

I want to executive produce Sports
Night.  May I give you my credentials?

ISAAC

I don't see any way of stopping you.

SALLY

I've been executive producer of West
Coast Update for 16 months.  Our show
has never failed to win its time slot.

ISAAC

You're on at two a.m., Sally, you're
competition is a Bonanza re-run and
four guys making cheese.

SALLY

To say nothing of Fox on Sports and
CNN/SI, both of which were on top of
us to the tune of a share point before
I came in.  My shows are tight, my
shows are hot and my shows are paced
to within an inch of their lives.  My
staff is aggressive and they place a
premium on professionalism.

ISAAC

My staff is professional, Sally.

SALLY

As we speak, One of your LC-SportsWire
frames is misprocessing data while two
of your associate producers stand over
the monitor attempting to have phone
sex.

ISAAC

God please don't tell me which two.

SALLY

Just think about it.

ISAAC

Alright, my guess is it's Jeremy and
Natalie.

SALLY

I meant think about me for the job.

ISAAC

Dana's job.

SALLY

Yes.

ISAAC

When Dana takes my job.

SALLY

Yes.

ISAAC

And tell me again what I'll be doing?

SALLY

I heard organic gardening.

ISAAC

You can leave now.

SALLY

Sharp suit.

ISAAC

Thanks very much.

SALLY LEAVES AS WE
CUT TO:

ACT II

(E)

INT. DAN AND CASEY'S OFFICE/NEWSROOM/STUDIO/COFFEE AREA -
NIGHT - (NIGHT 2)

(Dan, Casey, Dana, Natalie, Atmosphere)

CASEY AND DAN ARE IN SHIRTS AND TIES.  CASEY SITS AT THE TABLE
IN FRONT OF THE COMPUTER.  DAN SITS AT THE DESK MAKING NOTES
ON A PAD.

CASEY

(READING CASUALLY) "Good evening, from
New York City.  I'm Casey McCall
alongside Dan Rydell, those stories
plus we've got a Major League Baseball
trade that brought some birds home to
roost." (BEAT)  That's you.

DAN

What?

CASEY

"... Major Leage Baseball trade that
brought some birds home to roost", and
then you say:

DAN

Yoko Ono.

CASEY

(BEAT) Really?

DAN

Yes.

CASEY

Okay, but it might be better to say
something about hockey.

DAN

I'm gonna fix you up with Yoko Ono.

CASEY

(BEAT) I don't think so.

DAN

Yeah, I really am.

CASEY

No, you're really not.

DAN

Are you concerned about the age
difference?

CASEY

Do you even know Yoko Ono?

DAN

I am a fan of her music, yes.

CASEY

"...a Major League Baseball trade that
brough some birds home to roost."

DAN

You'll get away with that if you want,
but it's not birds, it's chickens.

CASEY

You really think Dana was flirting
with me?

DAN

Dana?

CASEY

Sally.

DAN

You said Dana.

CASEY

I meant Sally.

DAN

Stop thinking about Sally.

CASEY

I'm not thinking about Sally.

DAN

This is science fiction.  I'm all alone
on this.  I stand completely alone.
Sally is an alien, do you undersand
me?  At night she peels her body off
and lives on Steve Guttenberg's boat.

CASEY

And you can't get anybody to rally
around that theory?

DAN

My point is you said "Dana".

CASEY

Pigeons roost, don't they?

DAN

Yes.

CASEY

What's wrong with birds?

DAN

What's wrong with the unmistakable
human frailty of Yoko Ono?

DANA WALKS BY THE OFFICE AND CASEY CALLS TO HER--

CASEY

(CALLING) Dana--

CASEY EXITS THE OFFICE AS WE
RESET TO:
INT. NEWSROOM - CONTINUOUS - (NIGHT 2)

CASEY CROSSES TO DANA--

DANA

You're still a minute-twenty fat in
the 40's.

CASEY

We're getting there.  Can I say "birds
come home to roost"?

DANA

Yeah, I saw that.

THEY MOVE TOWARD THE CONTROL ROOM.

CASEY

Can I say it?

DANA

It's chickens.

CASEY

But I think it's also pigeons.

DANA

Do pigeons roost?

CASEY

I think they do.

DANA

I think they perch.

CASEY

I think they roost.

DANA

Look, it's fine with me.

DANA AND CASEY ENTER THE STUDIO AS WE
RESET TO:
INT. STUDIO - CONTINUOUS - (NIGHT 2)

CASEY

Hey, you know what?  I think someone
was flirting with me today.

DANA

I'm sorry?

CASEY

Someone might've been flirting with me
today.

DANA

Sally?

CASEY

How did you know?

DANA

Sally's always flirting with you.

CASEY

No she's not.

DANA

Yes she is.

CASEY LOOKS DISTRAUGHT...

DANA (CONT'D)

It's okay.

CASEY

Have I been flirting back?

DANA

You're kinda feeble, aren't you?

CASEY

Have I?

DANA

I really don't know.

CASEY

I don't want to look foolish.

DANA

Not much chance of that.

CASEY

Do I flirt badly?

DANA

You flirt fine.

CASEY

Seriously.

DANA

You flirt fine.

CASEY

Dana--

DANA

Flirt with me now.

CASEY

Flirt with you now?

DANA

Yes.

CASEY

I will.

DANA

Start.

CASEY

(PAUSE) How 'ya doin'?

DANA

That's good, Casey, how many years of
college?

CASEY

I'm just saying "Hi".  I've got more.

DANA

Lay it on me.

CASEY

What's your name?

DANA

Casey, I'm saying flirt with me.  I'm
not playing somebody else.

CASEY

You're not helping.

DANA

Start again.  Flirt with me.

CASEY

I'm starting now.  What's your name?

DANA

My name's Dana you unbelievable moron,
you've known me for 15 years.  Flirt
with me.  Tell me why you like me
better than Sally.

CASEY

I do like you better than Sally.

DANA

Tell me why.

CASEY

I don't understand.

DANA

I don't think you're ever going to
have sex again.  I gotta go.

DANA STARTS TO GO OFF--

CASEY

You're smoky.

DANA TURNS AROUND...

DANA

I'm sorry?

CASEY

The difference between you and Sally,
you're smoky.

DANA

I'm smoky?

CASEY

You're smoky.  You're a lot of other
things too, but you're smoky.

DANA

(BEAT)  I don't know what that means, but I like
the sound of it.  (BEAT)  Tell me what it means.

CASEY

It's hard to translate.

DANA

Try.

CASEY

You'll make a joke.

DANA

We're flirting.  That's okay.

CASEY

Are we really flirting, or ar you
just pretending to be you flirting
with me actually being me?

DANA

You think I'm smoky?

CASEY

Classy.  Impressive. Sexy.  (BEAT) Was
sexy going too far?

DANA

It was fine.

CASEY

You're smoky.

DANA

Thank you.

NATALIE WALKS BY--

DANA (CONT'D)

Natalie, wait up.  (TO CASEY) I'm
sorry, I gotta talk to Natalie.

CASEY

That's fine.

DANA

We're on the air in--very soon-- and
Natalie's there.

CASEY

Okay.

DANA

I'll see you later.

CASEY

In just a little bit in fact.

DANA

'Cause we're going on the air.

CASEY

And you're okay with birds roosting?

DANA

I'm okay with birds doing anything you
tell 'em to.

DANA FALLS IN STEP WITH NATALIE--

NATALIE

(QUIETLY)  Were you two flirting?

THEY WALK TOWARD THE COFFEE AREA AS WE
RESET TO:
INT. COFFEE AREA - CONTINUOUS - (NIGHT 2)

DANA

No.

NATALIE

You were.

DANA

We were, but it was a rehearsal of
sorts.  It was a class.

NATALIE

If you guys aren't too far along,
could Jeremy join?

DANA

Sure.

CUT TO:

ACT II

(H)

INT. ISAAC'S OFFICE - NIGHT - (NIGHT 2)
(Isaac, Kim, Elliot)

ISAAC SITS BEHIND HIS DESK AS KIM AND ELLIOT ENTER--

ELLIOT

Isaac?  You got a minute?

ISAAC

Kim.  Elliot.  How can I help you?

ELLIOT

I'm a team player, Isaac.  Always have
been.  Always will be.  But everyone
here moves up one notch and you make
Kim senior associate, I'll lead a
mutiny the likes of which will sink
this show for good.

ISAAC

Okay. Kim?

KIM

When I get Natalie's job, is there a
union regulations that prevents me from
making Elliot my man-slave?

ISAAC

Alright, that's it.  Follow me.

ISAAC GETS UP AND LEADS ELLIOT AND KIM OUT OF THE OFFICE AS
WE
CUT TO:

ACT II

(J)

INT. NEWSROOM/CONFERENCE ROOM - NIGHT - (NIGHT 2)
(Dan, Casey, Isaac, Dana, Jeremy, Natalie, Kim, Elliot,
Sally, Atmosphere)

NATALIE AND JEREMY ARE ARGUING OVER THE COMPUTER--

JEREMY

I'm saying it.

NATALIE

Let's just forget about it.

JEREMY

I'm saying it right now.

NATALIE

Far be it from me to be adventuresome
in our sex life.

JEREMY LOOKS AROUND AT THE NEWSROOM FULL OF PEOPLE, MANY OF
WHOM JUST HEARD THAT...

JEREMY

Thanks very much, folks, be sure and
tip your waitresses.

ISAAC COMES OUT, FOLLOWED BY KIM AND ELLIOT.  ISAAC CALLS OUT--

ISAAC

(CALLING OUT) Dan. Casey. Dana.
Jeremy.  Natalie.  In the conference
room.  Right now.

DAN, CASEY AND DANA APPEAR AND WILL GO INTO THE CONFERENCE
ROOM ALONG WITH NATALIE, JEREMY, KIM AND ELLIOT
.

CASEY

What's goin' on?

ISAAC

In there.

SALLY APPEARS--

ISAAC (CONT'D)

Sally.  Why don't you join us as well.

SALLY

What are we doing?

ISAAC

We're having a little meeting.

SALLY

Is this what I think it is?

ISAAC

Probably not.

THEY GO INTO THE CONFERENCE ROOM AS WE
RESET TO:
INT. CONFERENCE ROOM - CONTINUOUS - (NIGHT 2)

AS ISAAC IS THE LAST TO WALK IN--

ISAAC (CONT'D)

Good evening, how are you all?

EVERYONE STARTS TO VOICE COMPLAINTS AT ONCE--

ISAAC (CONT'D)

Who really gives a damn.  My name is
Isaac Jaffee. I run this place.
Anybody else who runs this place,
please raise your hand.

NOBODY DOES.

ISAAC (CONT'D)

Good.  Couple a things:  I'm not
quitting and I'm not getting fired.  At
least not today and probably not
tomorrow.  Let me add, Dana, that
things that I say in my office, stay
in my office.

DANA

Natalie's my second in command, she's
the only one I told.

NATALIE

Jeremy's my boyfriend and he's the
only one I told.

JEREMY

I told many, many people.

ISAAC

Elliot? Kim?  The production team is,
in fact, a team, and you will work
with and for whomever Dana tells you
to.

DANA

Thank you.

ISAAC

Shut up.

DANA

Okay.

ISAAC

Finally, I'd like to say that while
there are many programs here at CSC,
and there's nothing wrong with healthy
competition, we are all a family and
we are to treat each other with
professional respect.

SALLY

I think I can speak for everyone on
the West Coast Update team when I say
we have nothing by respect for each
and every man and woman who works on
Sports Night.

DAN

He's talkin' about you, ya freak!!

ISAAC

Thank you, Daniel.

DAN

I'm the one you love the most, aren't
I, Isaac?

ISAAC

No.  I hope this meeting has cleared up
any confusion.  It's five minutes to
eleven. Please go do my show.

EVERYONE GETS UP AND BEGINS TO DISPERSE AS WE
CUT TO:

ACT II

(K)

INT. STUDIO/CONTROL ROOM - NIGHT - (NIGHT 2)
(Dan, Casey, Dana, Jeremy, Natalie, Kim, Chris, Will, Dave)

IT'S A FEW MINUTES BEFORE THE SHOW AND THE PLACE IS STARTING
TO HOP.  DANA IS IN THE AUDIO ROOM--

DAVE

Stand by audio, stand by VTR.

CHRIS

Preview 3 and 13.

CHRIS

13's standing.

DANA

(ENTERING)  Get me Holly in L.A.

NATALIE

(QUIETLY TO DANA) He said you were
smoky?

DANA

Yes he did.

KIM

Holly.

DANA

(INTO HEADSET)  Holly, you were right,
it's fourteen points off the fast
break and send it back to the studio.

NATALIE

I like that.

DANA

Smoky?

NATALIE

Yes.

DANA

It was very complimentary.

NATALIE

It was very complimentary?

DANA

Yes.

NATALIE

Well how good of you to come to tea.

DANA

Hey, I talk the way I talk.  I'm smoky.

NATALIE

You are smoky.

DANA

I am.

DAVE

Roll VTR.

CHRIS

We're live in 60.

DANA

Good show everybody.

JEREMY

Good show.

NATALIE

(ELBOWING JEREMY) Casey said she's
smoky.

JEREMY

She is smoky.

NATALIE

Am I smoky?

JEREMY

You better believe it.  I'll tell you
what else you are:  You're a slow drink
of whiskey.

NATALIE

(BEAT)  Say some computer things.  Right
now.

JEREMY

Listen, seriously.  Those new herbs
that you're taking?  I think you should
stop.

NATALIE

I'm a slow drink of whiskey.

JEREMY

Among other things, yes.

DANA

Preview 6 and 6A.

IN THE STUDIO--

CASEY

It wasn't flirting.  It wasn't actual
flirting.

DAN

I don't like you going off on your own
like this.

CASEY

I know.

DAN

You gotta listen to what I tell you.

CASEY

I am.

DAN

You could be having sex with Yoko Ono
right now.

CASEY

Please don't ever say that again.

DAN

I've made a decision.

CASEY

What?

DAN

I don't think it's time.

DAVE

In three...two...

CASEY

Good evening, from New York City I'm
Casey McCall alongside Dan Rydell,
those stories plus we've got a Major
League Baseball trade that brought
some birds home to roost.

DAN

The ACC was the place to be in college
hoops last night and we'll take you to
the Dean Dome after a quick stop in
the Land of Lincoln.  You're watching
Sports Night on CSC, so stick around.

FADE TO BLACK

END OF SHOW